Friday, November 14, 2008

Bright Idea!

Why do some people hang their Christmas lights so early?  Is it because they are extremely festive?


It's because they have procrastinated before and have paid the price.

So, if you CHOOSE to delay the inevitable, know this:

-Salting the 2 inch slab of ice beneath the 20 foot ladder does not keep it from slipping.
-Thick snow, heavy boots, and a roof with a 45 degree slope = bad combination.
-You will not get any volunteers to help you.
-Have you ever tried to hang lights with gloves on?  Less Effective.
-Those blasted plastic clips break so easily at 15 degrees F.
-Trying to attach a rope of lights to a gutter can be a daunting task, especially when you are staring up at hundreds of pointy icicles hanging off the edge.
-If you drop anything, you'll be looking through 3 feet of snow to find it.
-Because severe cold + having your hands above your head for hours at a time is an instant recipe for frost bite.
-Your nose will run, but your face will be so cold that you won't even know it.  You probably won't care, either.
-Replacing tiny light bulbs with numb fingers is NOT a good idea.

So please, take my advice.  String your lights up tomorrow.  That's what I'm going to tell MY husband to do!


Kristina P. said...

Did Jesus have Christmas lights? No. I take all my Christmas cues from Jesus.

Can't wait to put the giant snowman on our landing!

susan said...

Hi! First, I wanna say I love your blog (which I found through Pulsipher Predilections).

Second, I wanna say thanks for explaining about the early lights in a way I can actually understand. It will make the next month waaaay less annoying knowing that the lights are up for a very good reason!

Karin said...

I think I know you...maybe? I like Kristina's theory. yesyesyes. "BB" (you know who that is, right?) shares the same idea I think. Always taking those cues from Jesus, he'll not be putting up lights. No time. So I"ll put up what I can reach with my kitchen chair. That would be porch lights.

michellejohnnie said...

Why take lights down at all? String them up once, leave them up the whole year. Just unplug them when you are sick of them. Then you can hang them in Sept or May when the weather is perfect. Sounds easy to me. Moreover- if you put red lights up, turn them on for Valentines and the 4th of July. I'm really brilliant!!!

michellejohnnie said...

Oh, I am going to add your site to my list of FAVs. You will be getting traffic like crazy!!! (Yeah, right.)

*MARY* said...

My nose juice has frozen solid before.

Token Asian Friend said...

Karin, Big B can build 20 foot high retaining walls in his backyard, but can't put up christmas lights?

Michelle, my neighbor had that idea, only he chose white and would alternate his porch lights depending on the holiday. Red/Green, Purple/Yellow, Red/Blue,
Red/pink, Orange/Black, etc.

Kristina, Can't wait to see you sporting a beard.

Susan, It's not so much the lights I find annoying as the radio stations that play christmas music the day after Halloween.

Mary, stop putting it in the freezer....normal people don't do that.